Escaping the Past
by ClarissaTrisKatniss
Summary: Clary has forgotten all of her memories prior to the accident three years ago and has been brainwashed by her abusive father to believe she killed her mother ten years ago. She is 18 now and wants to run away to escape her 'past', but will she uncover what really happened in her past? Characters in this story belong to the author Cassandra Clare.
1. Broken Dreams

The car screeched to a halt.  
"Clary baby?" My mother had called as a sat in the back seat, "Are you okay hunny?"  
"I'm fine mum."  
Panic seemed to stream across her face, but I wasn't affected by it. My ignorance to the world was intolerable as an eight year old.  
I looked at my surroundings to see that we were on a bridge, and it was crumbling in front of us.  
My mother sobbed in the front seat and my father fast asleep in the shotgun seat.  
The bridge collapsed completely within the next mere seconds. I remember the water filling my lungs as I struggled in the backseat. After that, I had awoken in a hospital without a scratch and my father sitting at my bedside. As I opened my eyes, the next words my father said would haunt my life forever.  
"_You killed her. Damn you Clarissa._"


	2. Short Tempered Father

**Sorry for the previous chapter being sooo short. The 1st chapter was just to explain the beginning of the abuse Clary is going to receive from her father and what had led up to what is going on now. Normally, I wouldn't write such short chapters, so yet again, I apologize for the inconvenience of that chapter. Now, for the part we all want. :p**

My retched screams pierced the silence of the house. He kept hitting me and he wouldn't stop.  
"God dammit Clarissa!" The voice haunted me.  
"I'm so sor-" I couldn't say anymore. Pain struck my body; blood trickled down my arm, staining my shirt. Out of the blurriness, my father grasped a knife firmly in his hand.  
I started to cry by instinct. Ever since my mother had drowned in the river, my father, Valentine, had been this way. He blamed me for her death and would accept nothing else.  
Valentine fell against the wall sobbing. "Why Jocelyn? Why her instead of you?" He managed to get out.  
In pain, I managed to get off the cold tile. My stomach turned in disagreement from the blood loss. I staggered as quick as I could to my room and locked the door, and then addressing my cuts on my arm. A few of them were probably going to need stitches. I put some makeshift bandages for the moment around my arm. Content with what I had done, I reached for my iPhone and dialed Simon, my cousin.  
He answered right away.  
"Hey Si."  
"What's up?"  
"Uh-uhm.." I had to make up another excuse. I couldn't tell him now, "I fell in some glass and my arm is all cut up, can you drive me to the hospital?"  
"Yeah, one moment. I'll be right over."  
"Okay thanks Si. I appreciate it again."  
"No prob." He hung up.  
I hated lying about my life, what my father does to me. I could never find the right time to do it though.  
Not five minutes later, his truck appeared in the driveway and I made a beeline for the door. Valentine had gotten up and was blocking my path to get out.  
"So you called Simon? What for? Are you trying to leave?"  
"No sir," I cried, "I was supposed to meet him at the cafe over an hour ago. He must've driven over and when I saw him pull in I remembered."  
"One time." He said, "I'll let this one slide one time." He moved out of the way and I stood there frozen and afraid to move as if it was a trap.  
"Go before I change my mind."  
"Yes sir." And without a second thought I left the house and got in the truck with Simon.  
"You know you need to stop being so klutzy."  
"Yeah." _Only of you knew what was really happening._  
The rest of the car ride to the hospital was silent so that have me time to think.  
I couldn't keep doing this, ten years I have suffered. None of my friends knew about my abusive father. They knew a strict father that was protective of his daughter. I was afraid to tell them anything, he was all I had left, even if he hurt me. There was only one thing left to do, run away for good.

**This is also a relatively short chapter, but I feel until I get the motivation and people are reading this, I might not write more of this story. **


	3. An Unexpected Visit

**So after waiting a little bit, I saw I did get views so people are interested, yay. I decided to go on with the story a bit more and we can progress to see what is going to happen, more yays. Now enough of my jibber jabber, and to the story. :)**  
_

The scent of cleanliness filled the atmosphere. The silence was interrupted by the sound of a steady heartbeat, my heartbeat. I slightly opened my eyes, being blinded by the sunlight through the cracks of the blinds. I quickly shut them again in pain. It must've been midday or later in the morning.  
"Hey there sleepy head." An unfamiliar voice spoke.  
I jumped, springing to life. The strangers golden hair complimented his eyes.  
"Who are you?" I asked, "I don't know you get out."  
"Now now. Let's not be rash about this. Your cousin Simon told me to stay here while he got some doughnuts. If it were my choice I wouldn't be here, so don't flatter yourself."  
"I asked who you were, I would like a name."  
"Jace. I'm assuming you are the wonderful Clarissa Simon told me about."  
"Please, just call me Clary." I looked at him curiously, but with worry on my face. I had forgotten I told my dad I was going to the cafe with Simon. "How long have I been here?"  
"Well, you've been out for at least two if not three days."  
"Jace, I have to get home."  
"Simon told me-"  
"No." I interrupted, "He doesn't understand."  
"Understand what?"  
I said too much. I turned away, "It's a touchy subject. I rather not."  
"It's okay. If you want to talk about it ever I'm here for you."  
Warmth radiated from his smile, I couldn't help but let out a small laugh. I felt an odd sense of security that I never felt before.  
"Just a question though, how did you _really_ get hurt yesterday?"  
"You don't believe that I fell on glass?" I asked defensively.  
"Listen, I know when people are lying. I won't tell anyone."  
"My dad-" I whimpered, "my father did this to me." I started to tear up.  
"It's okay, he won't hurt you anymore. I've been through the same problem, see look here." He pulled his shirt off his right shoulder, there laid a horrific scar. "I ran away Clary. I couldn't take it anymore." Pain struck his body as he tensed up.  
"_Why are you doing this Jace?_" My question struck him like daggers.  
His face flushed red and he got up out of his chair. "I'm sorry to have bothered you with my time. I'll just be going now."  
He was about halfway out the doorway before I called out to him, "No, don't leave me."  
He turned around, his golden eyes sparked.  
"Jace, stay here. I'm afraid and I need someone. I need you."  
"Well that was an unexpected turn of events there. First, you want me to leave, now, you are pleading for me to stay?"  
"I'm sorry I upset you. And no, I didn't want you to leave in the first place."  
He walked back over to my bedside, his face close to mine. I wanted to kiss him. His lips pressed against mine and it triggered sparks within my body. My hands ran through his silky hair and his tongue begged for entrance, which I granted.  
"Jace, I'm back!" I heard a familiar voice in the background.  
Before I knew it Simon stood in the doorway, his mouth wide open in shock.  
"God dammit Jace, I left you alone for not even thirty minutes and I come back to you making out with Clarissa!" He screamed in rage, "Well here's your god damn doughnuts you wanted."  
He threw the box at Jace who had gotten up to approach Simon.  
Tears stung my face as I saw Simon pacing away from my room.


	4. Forgotten Love

**More in depth time :)  
I get to now explain the thoughts of why Clary felt she wanted to kiss Jace and vise versa. All of the events are tied together in some shape or another. Story time ^-^**

Clary POV

The next day I was discharged from the hospital. Simon was there to pick me up. He said nothing to me the way home, and he dropped me off without saying goodbye.  
I walked in expecting a punishment, but before me stood Jace.

Jace POV

After I left the hospital last night, I was so enraged. Did Clary not remember me from when I last saw her? She seemed the same, but something was off, almost if she had forgotten who she was when she was younger.  
The girl I fell in love with wasn't there. She wore no leather, unmarked and no stele by her side. She lived her life like a mundie, it _sickened_ me.  
I almost remember it like it was yesterday. We stood in front of the California Institute promising each other we would see each other again before she was dragged out to New York. That was three years ago, but here she was, completely ignorant of the guy she loved standing before her. She had forgotten, and therefore broke her promise to me; I will be at your side no matter what.  
To make things even worse, her cousin Simon, he likes her. I could tell as he looked broken inside.  
My hands balled up into fists at the thought of it.  
She was my Clary, even if she didn't remember me. I had to get her to remember her past.

Clary POV

"Jace," my voice cracked, "why are you at my house?"  
"Do you remember _anything_ of us? Anything about living here previously?"  
"No, I just moved here, it's the first time I've been to California."  
"So you don't remember." He paused, but then added, "I will be by your side, or by the angel, will death strike me."  
My stomach lurched at those words. It made no sense, but it was like I had said those words to him.  
I starred at him blankly.  
"Do those words mean anything to you Clary?" His eyes pleaded for me to say yes.  
"I don't know."  
He looked at me with anger and rage, "Well, thanks for dismissing our love so quickly, you know, that kiss meant _nothing_ to me."  
"You're the one who kissed me in the first place!"  
"Don't act like you didn't want to kiss me Clary." He said with an attitude. "Can't you just think for a moment that you _actually_ loved me before you left for New York three years ago! Do you know how broken I've been since you've left me? I've hurt everyday since you left Clary, everyday." He then added after a breath quietly, "Hell, what am I talking about. You clearly don't remember anyways."


	5. Demon Encounter

**I want to thank everyone for giving me such positive feedback from this story; it's a great feeling to know people actually like your story. I want to thank my editor as well, Jemma16, she helps me soooooo much getting these stories out for everyone, it's incredible! All I'm trying to say is, thanks to everyone with the motivation for me to continue this lovely story. :)**

Clary POV

Jace stood by the doorway, hurt by my words that sounded all too familiar to me, but with no actual meaning behind them. Deep down, it hurt me to think even if I did say this to him; I didn't remember what so ever. I slouched down to my knees, afraid to look up to him anymore.

His comforting hand reached out for me, but I shoved it away, "How can you love someone, who doesn't remember you?" I cried. Without meaning to, I looked into his eyes and the warmth still radiated from his smile.

"I still love you, because I haven't stopped loving you from the day you left." He picked me up and placed his hands on my hips, pulling me into him.

My face was bright red. The feelings inside, I couldn't explain. It was if he's been there my entire life, through it with me. He looked at me as if he would step in and take the whipping for me. Something no one had ever done, stepped up for me.

"Jace," I barely muttered.

"Yes?"

"Help me, I want to run away."

He looked at me with an indescribable age on his face, the same look my father had when he beat me, "No," he said sternly, "I won't help you, and running away was the worst mistake I ever made."

"You don't understand this though! I can potentially die from this the way my father is acting!"  
He gave a slight growl under his breath, "Did you ever get hung by your father? Huh!" He screamed, "Yeah Clary, my father hung me from the ceiling! You're the one who doesn't understand!"

"So you're saying that you rather be living with your abusive father than out here not worrying what your father will do to you when you get home?"

"Yes that is exactly what I'm saying Clary. Now if you excuse me, I'll be on my way now."

"Why do you continue to run away from your problems?" I stopped him as he was going to walk off of the porch.

"You ignorant little girl, you still don't understand do you?"

"Understand what!"

"You're not human Clary. You'll see. You're just like me, and when I say this, I mean it; I am leaving now, and you'll never see me again. When you need help with your life, don't come crawling to me. Goodbye." He pushed his way past me and jogged westward down the sidewalk. I was left alone, and to be haunted by the guy with golden hair and eyes.

I returned to my room about an hour later. My father had been out all day with his friends, which I have been thankful for. Although he might be drunk when he gets home, I didn't have to deal with him now. I decided to cook dinner for us. Maybe that'd make him less angry at me, but I doubted it. Looking in the fridge, there was only a few items to choose from, and I ended up making meatloaf.

The door creaked open suddenly making me jump. My father stood in the entrance to the kitchen with bloodshot eyes.

"Uh, hey dad..." I tried to start a conversation with him, "I made us meatloaf, if you'd like some."

"No!" He yelled and slammed his fist down on the granite island in front of me. "I'm sick and tired of your bullshit Clarissa. Where the hell were you for the past two days?"

"I-I went to the hospital." The words lingered on my tongue.

He trudged towards me, his footsteps as heavy as his breathing. He took me by the neck and pinned me against the wall, "Why would you go there? I didn't hurt you enough to go there! Let me see why you went there!"

I pulled up my right hand sleeve to show a bandage. He briskly took it off, not caring if it hurt me or not. My arm had twenty-eight stitches lined up evenly to the cuts that had been placed there not that long ago. He then proceeded to clench my wrist where most of the stitches had been placed, tearing them causing them to bleed even more.

"Please stop dad, it hurts." I cried out holding back tears.

He let go of my wrist and my neck, allowing me to finally breathe clearly again after I gasped for air. Hysteria ran through my body. I imagined the crash again. Trying to catch my breath felt the same way as it did then. I remembered the look on my mothers' face as we plunged deep into the Hudson River, the winter waters striking my body trying to freeze me. I saw my dad reaching for her, but her refusing and waving her arm towards me. After a brief moment, he had finally agreed to take me instead. I had gotten out and placed along the shore, my father went back in to look for mother. There was when I blacked out. He had never found my mother.

I laid down on the floor in agony, hot tears streamed down my face. I got up slowly, feeling lightheaded, and walked towards my room locking the door behind me.

Jace POV

I kept walking for miles down the road until I reached the Institute of California, my home, a home to all Shadowhunters. I wish I had taken Clary with me, but she wouldn't see the beauty behind the institute beneath its glamour. She couldn't because she didn't remember how; I think I would just hurt her bringing her here. I cared about Clary, but she couldn't tell anymore. I had lost the most important person in my life it seemed sadly.  
I opened the door to the institute where Isabelle and Alec Lightwood, my step-sister and step-brother, stood awaiting my arrival.  
"Is she back?" Isabelle asked curiously.  
I shamefully looked down, "Kind of. She doesn't remember us."  
"Did you tell her anything about us or are you just assuming she doesn't?"  
"Assuming, if she can't remember anything of me, I highly doubt she remembers one of you."  
Alec chipped in, "I'll be down in the library if you need me, I don't have time for our unsuccessful get together."  
"Whatever Alec." Isabelle said.  
Alec turned with a slight jump in his step and walked into the dark hallway.  
"What are we going to do about this, about Clary?" I asked.  
"There's only one thing for us to do, when the time comes, we'll be there for her when she discovers she's a Shadowhunter again."  
"How long will that take?"  
"I'm not sure, but I'm willing to wait an eternity to get her back." I paused, "Maybe she remembers you, let's go see her."  
"At eleven in the night?"  
"Yes," I said matter-of-factly, "it's never too late to see someone."  
Isabelle laughed, "If you say so Jace."  
About fifteen minutes later, we were out the door after equipping ourselves with our blades and steles, heading towards Clarys' house.

Clary POV

I was extremely tired by nightfall. After getting in my pj's I climbed into bed and passed out.  
I awoke in the middle of the night to hear clashing downstairs. Even though I was still lightheaded, I decided to go check it out.  
As I got closer, the image struck me, I saw Jace hanging from the ceiling, noose around his neck.  
I screamed in horror.  
"Why Jace," I cried with a small voice, "I didn't mean anything I said."  
He started to turn, strangled by the rope tied to his neck. He was still alive.  
I had I find something to prop him up on, a chair or something.  
I ran to the kitchen and through my tears I grabbed the closest chair to me, dragging it back towards Jace.  
I stood him on it and climbed up to take off the noose, but it was just a hallucination.  
By the time I realized this wasn't Jace, but a dark and shadowy figure, it was too late. It's sharp fangs bared down at me as fear ran through my body.

I heard someone laughing in the distance as the creatures fangs tore into my neck. This pain took on a whole new level of agony.

"Goodbye Clary." The creature said as its master, my father, laughed manically on the couch.


	6. Runes

**Not much to say here, just have a great day and again for going out of your way to read this, is pretty freakin fantabulous if you ask me. :p**

Jace POV

I was almost certain when I heard screams from Clarys' house, but Isabelle didn't hear anything. She just nodded her head in disagreement. She assured me, "Nothing is wrong, don't worry about it at all. I'm sure Clary is fine."

The air seemed present, I swore I felt a demonic presence, something was wrong.

I knocked on the door when I had heard screams like someone was being murdered. My stomach felt like it was in my throat. This time I was sure I heard screams from Clary, and Isabelle heard it too.

I rammed into the door in worry now that I knew something was wrong, but to no avail. It seemed as if the door had been close shut and locked with a sealing rune.

"Clary!" I yelled, "Are you in there?"

It seemed at that moment, the screams silenced to a whisper. With one last attempt, I was able to break down the door, and that's when I saw a Fear Demon gnawing at the flesh of her frail neck. Her face had gone to a pale white and her eyes seemed lifeless. I couldn't do anything than just sit there in shock.

Isabelle on the other hand quickly grabbed her favorite weapon, her whip, and smashed it on the back of the beast.

Clary's lifeless body flew to the ground with and unbearable thud. She looked dead; it didn't look like she was breathing.

"Get her; I'll keep the Demon satisfied until you get her out of the house." Isabelle said, her voice shaking.

I ran over to her without questioning my actions. She still had a pulse, but she was barely breathing. Anger rose the more I kept looking at her, I wanted to kill the Demon who hurt her.

She looked up at me, her glassy eyes beating down me. She grabbed for my waistline, looking for something. She had grabbed my stele. I took curiosity to why out of all of the things I had on me, she chose this.

Clary POV

I couldn't tell what was happening around me. It seemed as if time itself had slowed down, leaving me dizzy and lightheaded. I remembered seeing Jace and another girl. What the hell was going on? My mind raced with too many possibilities to understand.

As my hand grabbed for the item in Jaces' pocket, my mind seemed to flash with different symbols, runes. I drew them on my arms, unsure with what I was doing, but they were drawn to perfection.

I gasped in pain as each one burned at my arm, but I continued anyways. Once finished, the object dropped out of my hands. My arms, once dull and lifeless, seemed to glow. My pulse grew and a rippled explosion flew away from my body.

The monster fell to its knees, gasping for air before it vanished into thin air.

I teared up in fear. What the hell had I just done? These markings, what were they? They seemed too familiar, but yet again, them seemed almost foreign to me.

"Clary, are you okay?" Jace asked.

"Yea," I paused, "why is Isabelle here though?"

Jace looked up at the jet black haired girl. Her eyes filled with almost as much shock as himself.

I started to stand up, unsuccessfully at first, but with the second attempt, I was up on my feet. Unluckily for me, nausa ran through my body and I fell to the ground again.

"How bad is the bite Jace?" Isabelle asked curiously.

"Well," he paused and rolled me over to see my neck, "it looks, horrific." He started to panic, "Iz, we need to take her back to the institute. Now."

Before I could protest, I had passed out.

**-Escaping the Past-**

_I had awoken in the hospital, with a feeling of déjà vu. The scene seemed all but too familiar for my taste. It was like the first day I met Jace, but the atmosphere was more intense._

_Cold fear settled at the bottom of my stomach. "Oh my God, he's going to kill me." Tears of panic pricked the corners of my eyes._

_Jace's golden eyes darkened. "Clary, who's going to kill you?"_

_I couldn't tell him. He would probably think I was weak, or agree with my father. It was my fault that my mother died, my fault, my fault, MY FAULT. I buried my head in my arms._

_"It's my fault she died," I whispered._

_"What is? Clary?" Jace sounded genuinely concerned but I couldn't tell him. I can't._

_"Why, the murder of my wife, of course." Oh my God. It was him. I raised my head to see my father standing above me, a knife in his hand, and a look of such fury and rage that it made me believe that I was less than nothing. I was trash, not even worthy to be stomped on._

_Jace leaped out of his chair. "What the hell? Who are you? How-"_

_Without even looking up, Valentine threw Jace out of the hospital window. I felt my face go paper white. No one could survive a fall from this high up. We were at least on the hundredth floor, if not more._

_I barely noticed when my father wrapped his fingers around my throat and lifted me into the air._

_"I've had enough of your disobedience," he hissed in my ear as he slowly suffocated me. "Your punishment will be your death."_

_I closed my eyes. So be it. At least I would forever be rid of his abuse. I just wish I didn't feel so guilty with so much blood on my hands. First Mom, now Jace... a guy I just met. Maybe it was for the best._

_Suddenly, Valentine's hand disappeared from my throat. I fell face first and on instinct put my hand out in front of me to stop my fall. Immediately red hot pain raced up my arm and I cried out as the bone snapped. I looked up to see Valentine fighting... Jace? But how? He couldn't have... but he was right there. In his hand he held a long blade that looked like it was formed from shimmering glass. It flashed as he battled my father, dancing throughout the fight. Valentine was clearly outmatched, though. Slowly, but surely, Jace started to push him against the wall. So quickly I almost missed it, he sliced open my father's abdomen._

_"Fool!" he screamed. "You dare to protect this demon of a girl? You will fail!" With that he threw his knife at me._

_Time seemed to slow down. I inspected the arm I threw up to protect myself. An ugly twisted dagger pierced it, poking out from the other side. The world started to spin. I no longer knew what was reality. I heard Jace shout my name. I saw my veins slowly starting to turn a sickly green. Poison, my sluggish mind thought. The blade must have been poisoned. I found myself in Jace's arms. I smiled at him._

_"Thank you," I whispered as the dream faded and I was drug back into reality._

I woke up with hot tears streaming down my face and gasping for air with two familiar faces staring down at me, investigating my arms sealed with Runes.


End file.
